Preventing the Power of Suggestion

Church Planting Series, Part twenty-two

When my wife was growing up, her older brother would sometimes get up in the morning and, in an act of brotherly antagonism, look straight at her and call her a “grump.” My wife, who was innocently watching Saturday morning cartoons, couldn’t believe what she just heard. She was most certainly not a grump! She was cheerfully watching cartoons and having a fine morning. But her brother persisted, rubbing the salt of his comment deeply into a developing wound.

After the second or third time, my wife’s ire would grow: “A grump?! I’m no grump. If anyone is grouchy it’s him! I’ll show him who’s out of sorts.”

Then she let loose. She gave him both barrels of sisterly scolding. What did her brother do? With a smirk on his face, he ran to his mother and father, told them how his sister had yelled at him, and turned to her once again and said, “See, you ARE a grump!”

The prophecy was fulfilled. Her day was ruined.

I’ve seen a similar scenario happen to pastors and church leaders. A person with an axe to grind or some emotional hurt to vent or some anger to displace lashes out: “You’re too controlling.” “You’re a weak leader.” “You’re offending everybody.” “Your ideas are too wild.”

You’ve heard it before. And when you hear the comment, the persistent drip, drip, drip, of unconstructive criticism, you get angry. You withdraw. You become depressed. And too often, you can veer into the dangerous territory of becoming exactly what you are accused of being, even though you never were what they said you are!

Be on guard, fellow servants of Christ. The ego-driven, sin-tainted-emotional reflex is a mighty force within. It’s easy to be baited into starting a war. If you have children, you know the drill.

Is there a better way? Jesus said, “To you who are ready for the truth, I say this: Love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst…If someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life” (Luke 6:27-30, The Message).

Once again, Jesus opens the counter-intuitive New Life to us. Buried and raised with Him, He provides the newness of life and newness of reflex we need. Let badgering bring out the best in you. Use aggravation to practice the servant life.

How do you do this? Practice “prophecy absorption” to prevent the power of suggestion. In other words, just listen. Don’t react. Respond by reflecting what your values are, not what you think you need to fight for. Reply with a humble apology and reinforce your love and care for Jesus and for each of His people, including the person speaking to you.

I remember being lambasted for including an edgy drama in a worship service. Instead of sticking up for my right to be creative in worship and listing all the Bible verses that reinforced my point, I simply responded with an apology to the person who was hurt by the drama. I said, “As a pastor, my hope is that everything I do brings people closer to Jesus. I am very sorry that this sent you away offended and feeling badly. I value your service to the Lord and your feelings as a member of this family of faith. I humbly ask for your forgiveness.”

Some people come to Christians looking for a fight. They’ve struck gold for many years and want to see another “hypocrite” bite the dust. What if you don’t give them a fight? What if, instead, you let antagonism bring the best out of you, not the worst? What if you turn the power of suggestion into the power of transformation?

Time For What You Love

Church Planting Series, Part twenty-one

The most common complaint I hear from people in ministry is: “I wish I had more time for what I love to do.” For some that’s planning for preaching and teaching. For others it’s strategic planning. Some want to free up more time for creating relationships. Still others want to be able to disciple people.

But for some reason these priorities get lost in the shuffle of an ever-moving, high-demand life and ministry. The constant flow of the “urgent” pushes away your constant desire to address the “important.”

I read recently that the typical worker spends 40% of his or her time on e-mail. Where is the time for dreaming, planning, and ordering your life? Will you find it in a typical seven-day week? Will sustained thought about your direction and priorities fit into a busy Tuesday or Wednesday?

It never did for me.

When I was pastoring a fledgling church plant, I had some time during the week, but I felt guilty for using that time for my own thought and planning instead of getting out there to create and sustain relationships. When the church grew in complexity and activity, time for thought and planning disappeared into staff meetings, trouble-shooting, and programmatic efforts.

That’s why I began a simple practice that totally transformed my approach to ministry. I started what I called “worship planning conferences.” Here’s an outline of how they looked:

1. Get away. Twice each year I, along with key leaders, loaded up our computers and planning materials and traveled about an hour and a half to a location where we could work and plan for two and a half days. We drove together so we could talk and prepare for our time away. At first we went to a hotel. Then we borrowed a kind person’s condo. But for Tuesday, Wednesday and half of Thursday in June and October, we changed venues to do some serious work and planning.

2. Work. We had a theme, goal, and plan for our time away. Once we got there, we began our work. The objectives were to plan every sermon series and worship service for the next 6-9 months and to discuss major needs, strategies and Spirit-led developments of ministry at the church.

3. Let God work. We did a lot of study and planning on our own, but we also brainstormed together, ate meals together, laughed together, and had a good time. Each of us also had quiet times to reflect and recharge. The days were long—from early morning to very late at night, but we were focusing on priorities and energized by being able to imagine. God built us together as a team and built Himself within us as we listened to Him.

What were the results of taking this time together?

1. We felt the satisfaction of being able to put first things first for God and His people.

2. We knew that we had a planned venue for serious study, conversation, and strategizing. Day to day demands didn’t get us down because we knew our planning time was coming.

3. We were able to provide worship plans in advance for staff and members. This showed respect for staff as we allowed them adequate time for planning and preparation. It also honored the people of the church by allowing us to publicize plans in advance. People used this information to reach out to others in an intentional and timely way.

4. We had time to do what we love. With much of the groundwork already completed, we were able to avoid the last-minute scramble of preparation. Time was available during the week to meet needs and to do what was truly important.

5. We gained a “big-picture” perspective of ministry. With a foundation of time to hear God’s voice and think about His direction, we were able to develop ministry, not just maintain it.

These two little annual retreats radically changed our ministry and attitude. We were no longer slaves to the moment. We were living in the freedom of doing what we loved.

If you need help or advice to start your own planning retreats, e-mail me at mnewman@txdistlcms.org.

Spiritual Warfare

Church Planting Series, Part twenty

John Maxwell once said that the devil will try to attack you before a Kingdom success, after a Kingdom success, and when you’re tired.

I’ve found this to be true, along with the fact that the devil tries to frustrate you, demoralize you, and foul up your demeanor with a slow but relentless accumulation of small inconveniences.

Recently, after a significant spiritual success in her life, my daughter’s furnace malfunctioned, her computer developed a glitch, her cell phone broke in half, and she acquired a strange kind of flu.

When big issues develop, we’re more apt to fall on our knees in prayer, search the Scriptures, and get some help. When little things crop up, however, we’re more likely to get crabby, to lash out, and to have our light put squarely under a bushel.

I once taught a Bible study called “Angels, Demons, and Major Household Appliances” because that’s the way spiritual warfare happens, isn’t it? You can count on annoyance, a Chinese water torture drip after drip of spiritual poise-breaking testing and temptation.

The devil goes after your morale, your pocketbook, and your kids. He tries to foul up your ministry. He attempts to drag your personal life into a morass of inconsistency and lapses of integrity. He leads you to worry and complaining, to anger and resentment.

We’re in a spiritual battle. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us that “our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

Yet, in this spiritual struggle, 2 Corinthians 2:11 gives us the good news that “we are not unaware of [the devil’s] schemes.” The devil is an open book, a known quantity, a limited spiritual being with a finite imagination and habitual pattern of evil. Sure he’s angry. He “prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). He’s ticked off. As Revelation 12:12 says, “He is filled with fury, because he knows that his time is short.” But he can only do so much.

What’s our job? The Bible says, “Be self-controlled and alert…Resist him, standing firm in faith” (1 Peter 5:8-9). “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you” (James 4:7). Remember, this resistance and awareness, this self-control, is not by our might or power. It’s by the Spirit of God. Standing firm in faith means standing firm in God doing His doing in your life. It means standing in grace. It means having the Word dwell in your richly. It means living in the shadow of the cross of Jesus Christ—-the One who conquered Satan and made him a short-timer, able to squirm outside the lake of fire only because of God’s patience that is not willing for any of us to perish, but for all to come to repentance.

Be alert. Be on guard. As you make plans to reach out, be ready—-and prepare the people you serve!—-for a spiritual battle. The glitches are no accident. After you experience the mountaintop of God’s movements in your church, be ready. A valley of foul-ups may be coming. When you’re tired, be self-controlled. You’ll want to quit ministry. You’ll feel awful. Don’t make any big decisions when you’re tired. Know the real story. Walk in faith.

The struggle is not in finding volunteers or getting more funding. It’s not in sound system malfunctions or frozen computer programs. The battle is greater and more worthy. Are you taking notice? Are you prepared? Are you letting people know that their awareness of the real battle will keep them close to the One who fights for us?

Revelation as a Resource

Church Planting Series, Part nineteen

John Ortberg once said that in order to get new people in the church, you had to publicize teaching on two topics: sex and the end-times. Then he commented, with tongue in cheek, that a blockbuster series would be “Sex in the End-times.”

Leaving the debate aside about the attractional model for the church, a truth Rev. Dr. Ortberg uttered is the high curiosity factor about the end-times—-especially about the book of Revelation.

People are fascinated with this book of the Bible. Even people outside the Christian faith, the de-churched, and the disillusioned are curious about this mysterious grand finale of the Scriptures.

I’m convinced that, in this strategic vision at the end of the Bible, there is method to God’s madness.

Admit it. People think church is boring. We’ve not always done the greatest job in conveying the awesome sense of a world-creating, Red Sea-splitting, fire from heaven-sending, miraculous Messiah-conceiving, ill and troubled-healing, on the cross-dying, from the dead-rising, sin-forgiving, life-transforming Savior God! In the rush of the day and clutter of the culture, the Almighty God, too often, has been getting lost in the shuffle.

This is where the genius of the book of Revelation comes in. During similar times in the late first century, Jesus appeared to the Apostle John, a reputable witness, in order to encourage suffering and straying believers. Instead of delivering a dry lecture, He gave a Scripture-saturated, eye-opening, mind-blowing vision of the invisible action in the spiritual realms. He proffered a prophetic repast that blew the doors off pagan persecution. God provided the zing that the church needed.

And it’s still zinging. People are drawn to examine this book of the Bible. They are eager to dig into the vision. They want to hear what God is saying. Unfortunately, we’ve let some confused and deceptive teachers get a corner on the market. They twist this final book of the Bible into their personal message of fear, their scheme to get rich quick, or their effort to gain control over others.

Isn’t it time we reclaim the book of Revelation for God’s wonderful purposes? Isn’t it time to remember that this book of the Bible is also one that “is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16)?

Revelation can be a great entry point for new believers. It asks the big questions and gives big answers for life. It also draws people in. God keeps the curiosity and wonder factors high in the book of Revelation. If you’d like to check out my new book, “Revelation: What the Last Book of the Bible Really Means,” as a resource for small group or large group study, click here. If you purchase a copy, please enter the discount code: 8N347JTM to receive $2.00 off every book you purchase. My prayer is that this book can help you reach out with Revelation!

Verbosity

Church Planting Series, Part eighteen

During a recent worship experience, I found myself lost in a cascade of words. So many words were coming my way, I couldn’t think anymore. I couldn’t focus. I became distracted. The words droned on. They swirled around me. They ran together and formed a washed out, blank screen. I was in a wilderness of words, a desert where every grain of sand was another noun, verb, participle, or adjective. I lost all focus on God, His will and His Word. There was way too much talking.

Verbosity. Too many words.

I’ve encountered the fire hose blast of verbal overload in a variety of worship settings. Repetitive and overdone liturgies, litanies, and responses have numbed my brain. Droning verbal transitions between praise songs have lulled me into inattentiveness.

I’ve encountered verbosity in small groups and Bible studies. Leaders dominated the agenda, answered their own questions, and prevented any interaction between group members. No relationships could be formed. We were alone in a crowd, insulated from each other by the wash of words from the leader.

This is a problem. Words can get in the way of THE WORD. Jesus highlighted this issue in Matthew 6:7-8, “When you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” In verse seven, Jesus uses Greek words that paint the picture of verbal overflow: the verb “Battalogeo,” and the noun “polulogia.” Both words sound like a babbling overflow of verbiage. Jesus noted that verbosity is connected with pagan desperation—-a reliance upon self instead of trust in the true God.

Across the centuries, pagans have flooded the culture with word overflow. The Babylonian creation epic, Enuma Elish, contains over 6000 words in a poetic form. Today’s media-saturated world keep the verbosity flowing steadily into our lives. Contrast that with the Biblical creation account. It is a Hebrew historical narrative of only 786 words. God is the God of few words. Instead of leaving us an encyclopedia of do’s and don’ts, God gave us a book, a short book that we can carry with us, as His Word of life.

Why doesn’t God have to flood us with verbosity? His Word is living and active. His Word has power. His Word works! His Word can tolerate silence, thought and reflection because the Spirit works through the Word, “dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12). One Word of God can do what our many words can never accomplish. The Word made flesh, Jesus, gives life.

Please understand me. I’m not speaking against communication. I’m simply asking that we choose words wisely and sparingly. I’m asking that we give God a chance to speak—that we pause enough to let Him get through. Perhaps we need to think about the proliferation of words that we send into the gathering of God’s people. What are we accomplishing? What needs to change? Is there room for the Living Word of God to work in the midst of our many words? Are we overloading people or are we giving a simple, clear, and Christ-centered message?

Less is more. Jesus showed us that. Let’s not let verbosity get in the way of the Word that will not return empty, but will accomplish that for which God sent it.

A New Generation

Church Planting Series, Part seventeen

I was hanging out with some young ministry leaders over the weekend. These college students and recent graduates were fired up in their faith and ready to reach the world for Christ. But they were thinking differently about ministry.

I asked one person what ministry path he was thinking about. He responded, “My life is my ministry.” He is forging ahead to become a math teacher, making every moment of his life outreach for Christ and using every opportunity to serve inside and outside the church.

Another young leader heard me make the comment, “The church is not a building; it’s the people.” He let out a loud “Amen” and proceeded to talk about the small group he is in and how they serve and reach the lost.

A young woman told me how she came to know Jesus and how she started reaching her young classmates who were on the fringes of the mainstream.

My friend told me about his college student daughter who is looking for a church while she’s away at school. One front-runner was a “church under the bridge” that met with and served the homeless.

A seminarian getting ready to graduate told me about his desire to partner with a friend to become “worker-priests” and simply live with inner-city residents to see how Jesus might open doors for life transformation with the Gospel.

There is a new generation of young ministry leaders. This generation is not thinking as much about career in ministry as they are about contributing to the expansion of the Kingdom. These leaders are not thinking as much about mega-church building as they are about making Christ’s difference in the world. These Christ-followers are thinking not as much about stardom as they are about sacrifice. These servants are not thinking as much about charging into the world with a big impact as they are about changing the world one person at a time.

How can we be good stewards of these new generation leaders? Shall we funnel them into old systems of training and church structure? Shall we tell them that they are idealists who need to get real and get with the old, established programs? Or shall we let these leaders soar by giving them permission, training, mentoring, support, and maximum flexibility to allow for a new movement of transformational ministry for Jesus?

Church is moving outside the walls. A new generation of leaders wants to bring Jesus to the world in a powerful way. Can we join them? Can we contribute to this new movement? Can we be part of a decentralized, smaller, servant-oriented, fluid network of faith communities that infiltrate neighborhoods and cities with Jesus? What will that look like? What steps must we take to get there?

What Vantage Point?

Church Planting Series, Part sixteen

The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America has decided to make it possible “for people in publicly accountable, lifelong, monogamous, same-gender relationships to serve as ELCA associates in ministry, clergy, deaconesses and diaconal ministers” (quote from ELCA website).

This decision is sending waves of emotion and debate throughout the Church. But what does it all mean for the way we serve God and seek to grow His Kingdom? One takeaway is this: it requires us to ask the question, “What vantage point do you use for making decisions?”

The ELCA is using the vantage point of human observation and reasoning. To the decision makers, it makes sense to take this step. Society is changing. People have needs.

But is that a sound vantage point? What if we were to ask a few follow-up questions regarding that vantage point and human sexuality? Here goes:

-Have we managed sexuality well as a culture?
-Have we cherished women or demeaned them?
-Have we honored children or injured them?
-Have we veered into more trouble or less trouble in the area of sexuality?

You don’t have to think very long and hard to see that we’ve really messed up human sexuality. We do a terrible job! Trouble is at a high point. Women are treated as objects. Children are injured and abused. Sexual corruption is viral—-spreading as fast as the Internet allows, and as quickly as our sin-stained souls latch on to the immoral.

So, how can anyone really believe that we can get the question of same-gender relationships right when we use the vantage point of human observation and reasoning? It’s the wrong standard. It is flawed.

The only vantage point that brings workable, healthy, and life-giving results is God’s vantage point. God’s Word is His blessing that forms our lives, practices, and very souls. God’s Word is the objective vantage point that will never lead us astray. It rescues us from relying on our corrupt perspective of life. It gives us the mind of Christ. It will lead us home.

The question to ask about every issue in ministry is: What is God’s vantage point?

And the question to ask about human sexuality is: What is God’s vantage point? He’s made it crystal clear: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24 and Ephesians 5:31). The gift of human sexuality is meant to reflect the love of God, the groom, for His bride, the Church. It is about self-sacrificial love. It is about creating new life (procreation). It is good. It is healthy.

The Bible isn’t cryptic about this. Sexual sin has been a destructive point of stumbling for humanity for thousands of years. God doesn’t keep us in the dark about what His intentions are, what is good, and what works.

How can a denomination lose its bearings? The same way we all do. We forsake the vantage point of God and His Word. We substitute our own twisted, darkened vantage point of human observation and reasoning.

Let’s learn from this. If you’re really about God’s Kingdom, choose your vantage point carefully and wisely.